» this is old, but is still funny.....
* Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
* And do not start a sentence with a conjunction.
* It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
* Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat).
* Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
* Be more or less specific.
* No sentence fragments.
* Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
* Don't use no double negatives.
* Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
* One-word sentences? Eliminate.
* Eliminate commas, that are, not necessary.
* Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
* Kill all exclamation points!!!
* Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
* Who needs rhetorical questions?
* Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.