November 6, 2004

is he????

Although Brazil is a country shaped by immigrants, with its cultural and ethnic diversities, Brazilians are not exempted of being stereotyped. And these stereotypes are very clear: we are supposed to be happy and festive people, always dancing to some drums, being sensual and relaxed about our bodies, which should be beautiful and tanned. We Brazilians are also supposed to be dark skinned with long hair for women and mustache for men. And if you don’t dance, don’t play soccer and have not a flamboyant and naïve personality, something must be wrong with you and you might even not be Brazilian at all! [“are you sure you are Brazilian?” I was asked once, after saying that I despised the horribly famous Carnival].

Because of these misguided and confused visions of Brazilians, my husband and I have had plenty of awkward moments answering a lot of silly questions related to HIS nationality. Why? Because even though he is Brazilian, he doesn’t look “Brazilian”! [According to the experts, of course!]

I have compiled a list of questions he and I are constantly hearing and trying to answer without being sarcastic or impolite. Keep in mind that these are REAL questions, made by real people - Americans, Canadians, foreigners and many Brazilians, which sort of confirms that we, Brazilians, also buy this stereotype crap about ourselves.

Questions my husband is always hearing:

- Do you speak Portuguese?
- Were you born in Brazil, I mean, are you a native Brazilian?
- Are you Brazilian???!!!! [Expression of surprise on the face]
- Did you meet your wife [* Pocahontas] in Brazil?

Questions I am always hearing about my husband:

- Does he speak Portuguese?
- Is your husband American?
- Can I speak Portuguese with him?
- Are you SURE this is your husband??? I thought he was darker and had a mustache [* “you forgot to mention the sombrero”, was my answer to this one… I couldn’t help myself….]
- Did you meet your husband here, in the United States?
- Does your husband understand Portuguese?
- Did he live in Brazil?
- Is your husband Brazilian???!!! You mean, a native? He was born in Brazil??!! [A very surprised look on the face]